Thoughts

So, I haven't posted in over a month... what is up with that? I mean, even though I think my sister-in-law is the only one that reads my blog... it is still good for me to jot down my feelings and thoughts. Here we go! But beware, I have a lot of thoughts and feelings that may expose you to my positive side, along with my "poor me" side! This is why I NEED to go camping this weekend... to focus back in on my life and important things.

Relief Society has been crazy this last month. I mean, it's been non-stop since we first started in May, but this month we were given a task by our Stake President to contact and invite/find out about every person in our Ward. Now, we had 103 sisters in R.S. And only 20-30 that come to church... you can do the math, we had a lot to find out about. I wasn't very excited about this task, but for some reason, I didn't let that get me down. I wanted to do this not only for the Stake President, but for me. I wanted to know about those girls too. We had 3 weeks to do this. I tried to give visiting teachers most of the girls, but our presidency ended up contacting most of them anyway. We did it. We achieved a huge task and I am so relieved to KNOW where my sisters are! My mind kept going back to 1 Nephi 3:7. The Lord does provide a way for us to accomplish whatever he asks us to do... in all aspects of our lives!

Lately I have been a bit emotional about my situation, which has happened before, but for some reason lately it's been extra hard. I see the way people treat their kids. How unkind and impatient they are with them. It's almost as if they are trying to prove to their kids that they have power over them. I want to pull them aside and shake the heck out of those parents! *Here we go* Don't they realize that some of us would love to have someone call us "Mommy"? To have a little child hold us and hug us... desiring to be with no one else in the world but you. To hear their little laugh and wipe away their little tears. I truly long for that. I long to hear those words spoken to me. To have those feelings for my child. I know, here is my "poor me" moment. I am not saying this to get sympathy. I'm just saying it.

Last night we went to see the Wedding Singer at Hale Theatre. It was so funny and had a lot of way cute parts in it. But I left there feeling alone. Very alone.

Enough! I know God has a plan for me. I know His timing is the most important thing. I just need to go camping and commune with him! ;o)